F.E.A.R

Juz now.. while otw back from work.. in d train... suddenly all flashbacks haunt me agen! how could it even appear? imagine im stucked in d middle, wid all sort of human beings ard me.. d train is so packed... different kinds of odour.. n this flashbacks still come without me inviting them in!

so can u just see and understand?? dat memories, be it good or bad, dey wunt be easily erased from ur life.. lagi lagi the ones which affected ur life so much! it aint easy people.. trust me its not gonna be easy.. haiz...

besides flashbacks.. i had dis kinda fear too.. afraid dat HISTORY will REPEAT by itself agen... be it by itself or it happens by stupidity! im jus so afraid... dunno if i have the courage and strength to go thru all dat agen by myself...

this was wad i felt throughout my whole journey back home.. i didnt even talk to ayah while walkin back from the station... :(

Right now, i try to cast aside all dat tots.. cuz im kinda excited for tmr.. after work, gonna settle some wedding preps wid mum.. n maybe do a lil shopping wid her? ;)

Ya Allah.. Dear God.. gimme the chance to go on wid life, strength to go thru all ur tests, and may u blessed me wid d happiness dat i deserve.. insya'Allah... AMIN.